me...

I feel sad for these 2 days especially after i knew how Xiao Pei think about me. She is Senior Nurse Educator. But she never tell me all these in person. Not even Mr. Neo, not right after he knew that. Not anyone. I was wondering did they really want to pass me? If yes, why dont they tell me straight right on front of my face? So that i'll know where and how much more i have to improve so that i can pass the repeat posting?? I'm fucking hate NUH!!

Last time also left with 3 weeks then tell me its impossible for me to have sudden improve, which they think i'm not a safe nurse. Now, left with 2 weeks time, and my preceptor tell me all these. What's wrong with them man... Cant they just tell what's in their mind and stop pretending that they are fucking good?! 

To be frank, human gave up on me, so do i gave up on this world. Suicidal thoughts hunting me days and nights. It make me feel horrible to let anyone know about how i wanted to inflict pain on myself so that will make me feel much more better. 

At a point of time, i felt so lonely and felt like i'm the only loser left in this planet. Tell me, tell me, why am i born in this world at the 1st place? I dont even dare to give mom a call, and tell her how i feel right now.. i'm so scared i'll make her worried again like last time... i'm so freaking lousy...

I need pain on my skin... i need to see blood flow out from my body... people think i'm crazy... perhaps i am... 

Days went back to m'sia @8/3/2011 - 10/3/2011

Went back to M'sia on Tuesday late evening. But as according to plan, we supposed to go back on Wednesday, Lynn's appointment was canceled suddenly, so we just decided to rush back for the Pasar Malam. Because I miss the food!! And I hope Lynn enjoyed the trip to M'sia, my home this time round.

As usual, i asked mom to get malay food for me, as my favorite pasar malam food are tauhu bakar with rojak sauce, nasi lemak, you cha kuai, and soya milk. Lynn doesn't take chicken so i didn't ask mom to get anything for her, but I managed to get her Ko Lo Mee ( sarawak style dried noodle) which is quite nice. After finish our late dinner, I brought her out to pasar malam with my bike.

Staple- like sewing machine. RM10. Makes sewing easier. But i still haven figure out how to operate it. Well, no worry, i'm not the one who bought this. I had my own personal tailor, my MOM!!

Pasar malam ends at 10pm, and Lynn managed to try some local drinks and tibits although we were quite full. I just had to explain to her things that she didn't see before in Sg. Well, that's a tour guide's job right??

After that, we headed home for sleep. Because it's shopping time tomorrow!!! Yay!!

I drove there, to Jusco Bukit Indah. And we met Si Ting there ACCIDENTALLY!! What a small world!!

Our 1st stop, the washroom. We spent 20 mins in there just to take photos. Our photos was taken up to 30 plus with both of our camera.

Actually Lynn bought quite a lot of stuffs there till she kind of broke. Hahaha!! Then we had lunch at A&W, kind of upset or felt being cheated that the burger that i order was Double Fortune Chicken Burger, which supposed to be big, but in the reality it was just this big..And its black pepper!! I hate black pepper!!

Now its show time.. LYNN!! eating green tea flavor doughnut... greeny..

Mine is durian flavor but its all in my stomach.. not very nice.. I prefer Chewy Junior!! Choc madness!!

Sutera Mall~~ Fish spa!! RM8 for 30 mins.. its so ticklish...

Next station: Secret Recipe

My fav banana choc, Lynn's White choc Love it!! And some green salad!!

I didn't capture any photo of my new nail color but i loved my toe nail color. Like Lynn said: It's lee lee's color!! Why?? Because it's red in color!! OMG!!

After that we went for a late night massage at the other massage centre! Freaking nice la, RM60 for 1 hour!! Maybe will try Thai or Javanese massage next time!!

KFC for brunch the next day!!

Lynn & Mom!

Mom always posed weirdly.. but i still love her.. i want to get some graduate photos with her.. and maybe dad??? Ok.. I know i should appreciate him.. i will.. believe me.. (felt a bit guilty because i'm kind of lying..)

Hahah.. then I sent Lynn off with Si Ting to bus station. I spend around 5 days at home doing nothing. But i',m enjoying my holidays.. Short holidays..

Day out hunting for Feb Chinese New Year Clothes

This is another old post. It happened before Chinese New Year. Another outing with Mr. Ivan Tan. We met at Bugis, and I was late. So punishment was to treat him a nice lunch. So we headed to Iluma, Emperor State. A western restaurant. Food was nice except for the pasta and mushroom soup. Taste weird i can say.

Let's let the photos do the talking.

Here is the mushroom soup. Perhaps chef used wild mushroom to make this soup but i just don't like the taste.

And pasta... that whitish foam, i'm not sure what that is, but surely doesn't taste good. Other than that the whole chicken was damn nice, delicious!!

Orders are here. Let's tuck in! IItadakimas!!

 I'm so concentrate on my chicken!!!

Half of the chicken gone, just like that.

Well, i must admit that i had a great appetite.. always do...

 And this is what i get for myself, a nice black heel. My favourite!! And till the end of the post, i forgotten that i didn't captured what i had bought as the title is "new year clothes hunting". Maybe i just have to show it on my body~~ ouh~~ 

I like this clothes. Make me look elegant... muahahah!! $10!! hahaha!! <3