TuRtle's MuTuAl BoYfriEnd

What's in my mind?? I have freaking no idea...
I felt sad when I received the news that I can't move back to SG this month. Sad but what to do when I chose to leave that house at the 1st place?? I thought I should leave that house and PC since there's some conflicts that happened between us. But after I stay at Lynn's house for such a long period, I realized there's no 1 can be PC's substitute. I was wrong when I thought or I assumed that she doesn't suits me anymore. Well, I really apologized about how I feel about u for the past few months.. Human learned by making mistakes.. But this is just a minor mistakes that I had done so far and still can manage to fix it in the future. But sometimes, there's mistakes that can't be made up for anyone once it's done..
At times, human learned and afraid of loosing some body that we loved the most, yet, we tend to make more mistakes to that particular person..
Justin had keep asking me to be his gf, but still there's an instinct that lead me to keep thinking that he is more concern about the love that I can give him on the bed.. I'm sorry but all the evidences just showed that's what he want.. Perhaps I was wrong again with my assumptions.. But I just can't persuade myself that he is true to me.
Even Melvyn also the same at times.. Guys..
God knows everything.. They said.. He knows the best for us..
Life.. At times is a torture for me.. Mom is my priority, no matter how long, how fast time past.. I had forgotten since when mom had become so important to me.. I feel that I only live because of her existence..
Not wrong but not absolutely correct as well...
Dreams, money, reality. What make us in the future? What make me now? Dream? Money? Passion of living? I have no idea..
I don't want my life is just surrounded with work.. I had finally found something else that I find it's worth fighting for. Something that meant more than couple love.. Love that I shared with Buddha.. Those kids.. They made my day..



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