Happy Nurse's Day

I found Mr.Alan in Malay traditional costume. And he has performance. The very first time i saw he dance. Although I already know he is a very funny lecturer. Mr. Alan is a very good lecturer. He teach us with patient. I really need to thanks him, because of him, I can pass all my skill test. If he wasn't married and have kids, or he was a little bit younger, i think i'll fall in love with him. Such a nice guy. Mr. Alan dancing and have performance on Nurse's Day

Mr. Alan & me

Mr. Bernard Lian & me. Mr. Bernard also is a funny lecturer. I also like him very much. He always make us laugh till tummy ache. By the way, i think most of those lecturer who study psychology was very special and funny lo. hahahaha....

Anyway, i was whoo a lot today. And i saw him, he wear red. And when we are having some refreshments, we just stand by sides, so coincident. Hahaha... I can see him from such a near distance. But he have lots of gray hair, just like me. He looked lonely, he was alone during the celebration. But he quite cute lo, still can come and celebrate although he is alone to enjoy the celebration.
Don't know how to explain, i can feel that he really know i have some feeling for him, but even if he know, but i'm doubt that he will take any action. Sad sia... i don't wanna take action first...but i like to look at him... hahahaha

Mr. Men Little Miss

little miss chatterbox

little miss sunshine

Mr. Nosey & Mr. small

Little Miss Chatterbox, Mr. Nosey & Mr. Small

In order to get all this Mr. Men Little Miss, Chin and me brought and choose near our house. But still need to thank the China shopkeeper. He help us to get the characters that we want. Hmmm... I'm not sure why he so kind hearted... but yet, still need to thanked him lo..

I dun know what happen to me today, just keep on laughing, laughing and laughing... From school to home, from home to 7-11, from 7-11 to home. Laugh non stop. This cause me too energetic, then just sleep for 3 hours only. I fall sick on the next day... but after took medicine, i recover very fast... hahahah

family...

This is my brother and sister. Taken at home last Sunday...
My younger sister took her photo...so annoying.. So young already so shameless.. took her own photo...

This was the photo that she took early in the morning.. Disturb me from sleeping... Kacau betul...

Here, my lovely mom.. haha.. It's me who took her photo when she was sleeping beside me...i love to sleep with her...

Presentations...

The continuous presentations make me can't breath... The Basic Cardiac Life Saving test was on 21th of July.. its next week... and i'll be the first group going for the test.. Although practiced for a few time, but my skill wasn't improved like i was expected. Plus tomorrow still have Clinical Trial test. Probably I'm tired of all this tests that coming like a flow river that rush and force us till encounter difficulty in breathing...SOB... Sometimes, really can't be bothered with all these test and exams. Like giving up, but can't do that because in conscious mind, I know i can't give up..like my life was stucked in the middle of continue or give up..
This semester was not a good semester. Before the semestral exam, we still need to go out for clinical attachment for 2 weeks. Then have to come back and sit for the exam. So rush, need to do well in attachment and exam... Really lack of confident..

I'm not sure who had read my blog, but I'm sure who ever that wanna know me more or concern about my progress in life, they will definitely have a look at my blog... I do appreciate those who always read my blog...I was wondering how was Wei Long's life now. Maybe we can still be friend if he wasn't that ego... Can't be bother anyway... But sometimes, i miss him and also hate him...

What was I thinking when i was single? Want to have fun like a single.. but I don't have much friends here... But think back my life in Perlis, if i was single also the same. Because i really not good in knowing friends.. I don't know why, but there was no guys want to know me when i was there. How pathetic...

My dinner + supper....

On sunday night, we went out for our very late dinner. Chin and me. Both of us haven eat a single food since the brunch that we had in the afternoon. The roti prata... which was already deproved. So oily and not crunchy at all. Plus the gravy also not nice. Taste weird. Then Chin went out the whole day. Left me alone.. at home...whoo..HOME ALONE.. "lonely, i'm miss lonely, i has no body of my own... " Really boring till death lo...Haiz...

Then i end up disturbing The Monk. But the monk was not in very good condition to being disturded by me. Then i realize, i was back to my old life again that day. The life that don't wanna be alone, but try to find someone to talk to, to accompany me. if have girls that wanna chat with me the whole day i also don't mind actually..

Okok, back to the supper thing. This is Chin, my room mate. She was not willing to be taken photo by me. Haiz..so the photo end up like this...

Then i was ordered 1 bottle of beer to drink. Because i think it will better if i just drink a bottle of beer rather than i starts smoking. Am i right? Although i always have the urge to smoke. But i still afraid to make the 1st move. Because mom will feel disapointed if i do so. So i drink the beer. Chin don't like to drink, so i drank alone. Miss lonely again.

too much bubbles in my beer, so i suck it, and show it to Chin. Hahaha. She don't like when i do this. But actually no one like me when i do this. Hahaha...like banana milk ...

Hahaha... this is what we had ate. Seaweed soup, salad you tiao, and salted fish chicken claypot. The food was better than last time. And i ate 2 bowls of rice. Scary sia. Because i was super duper hungry.

finished everything...Muahahahaha....

my glass of beer... Seriously, i can't finish 1 bottle of beer alone..

Well, i think i need to continue my life alone...haiz...sometime, the lonelyness was not good...

Cried...

Last night, i cried...again... This time round, it's because of many reasons. Wanna know? I'll tell then..

1. My leg very pain. When i went to work, i think my wound triggered with my movement. And this time, I was nearly cry just because of my leg pain. And i was think of my mom. If i'm with her now, she'll pamper me. How warm and sweet it will be..

2. And when my leg pain, and i miss my mom, i started have all those -ve thoughts running in my mind. "if i'm from a rich family, If i'm not encountered with any financial problem, If i'm sponsored..." Plus i just received a letter from school. Says that my dad haven't pay the fees, this really added my problem. So i had decided to apply for tuition fee loan. This is to lighten my family's burden.

3. All these became worser when my thinking fly over the spot that where my ex live.. i mean in my brain...those statements... make me feel so lost and down... I'm no longer myself anymore...everything had change and also have to change...

4. When mom called me last night, i was crying and that make my nose blocked. Mom thought my flu haven't cure. She ask me to see a doctor. Mom, i'm sorry if i make you worried about me. And when you say, i have to study ahrd ands have a job as a nurse in the future. I felt guilty. Because my result was all just pass. I'm sorry...so sorry...

I don't want to be bullied by guys anymore. Mom, i miss you. Hahaha...this remind me about last night's sms. I say "love u.." But you are like shy, then just say u want to go to bed already. Mom, you are so cute, this make me love you more.

Today met a "monk" from AMK. The look still consider ok to me, then we had luch at Pepper Lunch. And i had to pay about $10 for food that can't make me feel full. Haiz,,, what a waste of money.

that we had some walk around AMK HUB. Then have a cup of coffee at kopitiam.

Today, i was not feeling good. Because my leg still very pain. Plus have many customers today and its also was a rainy day. Now, i'm phobia to rainy day. Thanks to the fall. This was the second time i had my fall in Singapore. I had learned something from my previous relationship... I'm not sure this phenomena was happenning all over the world or just in Singapore, i realize that most of the guys, they have almost the same policy, which is they will love you for 100% if they manage to own you, but they will also intend to destroy you for 100% if they can't own you. He was trying to say that: "Little turtle is a cureless bitch..." I'm not sure how true is this statement, but somehow, i do believe that he was that kind of person who will say these kind of things...Perhaps i'm not that understand him... That's why we break up. The reasons? Long story.. very long... I'm just a common girl with ordinary look. People who pass by me, will not have any extra attention to me. Because i'm just a common girl. I don't wish i'll became an extraordinary person but there was 1 thing that i'm very sure. I'm super duper special in my family's eyes.

Today, I was happily waited for Chin to go home together. Then she asked me to buy french fries and i also brought iced milo for myself. After that we walked home. I was intended to test the wireless coverage of NYP, so i took my laptop and walked toward the gate with a cup of milo in my hand. So Chin and i were happily walked and talked all the way. And i was forgotten that the floor was wet and my stupid NIKE shoes's base was very slippery.
Then i was just walked past an iron panel that was used to cover the drain. Then, ARHH...i fell down and broke my skin at the right knee...(crying) And what make me feel more more more and more funny was Chin, she shout louder than me. And this action attracted those students who were walking in front of us. Then they just turn around and walked to us, and asked me whether i'm ok or not. Such a nice guy, and i hope he is not from nursing..because it's so embarrasing. Then there were some guys walking from behind, they just laugh at me. Stupid guys. Then they ask me whether i'm ok or not, but they was just ask and go. Haiz, but somehow, i was just hope that they will not recognize my face. hahaha..

right knee was bleeding till my leg. Damn pain sia....

PAIN!!!! PAIN!!!!

BLEEDING!!! i think can't walk straight tomorrow...wooowooo.....

Now, I added some scars on my pitty knee, like my mom say, maybe can put some tattoo on it just to cover the scar. hahaha...Ohhh, how i love my mom. She was so cute...

Hair...

This picture was taken today while we were in the lecture hall. Although my hair style didn't change much, but it was my own masterpiece. So i was quite satisfied. And i had put some colour to all over my hair. Actually it's burgandy, but as a result, it looks like red wine colour. But anyway i still like the colour. But shuang shuang say not really suits me, she say the colour make me look darker. Haiz..

This is the guy that i like.. whehw.. I took his picture today. We met again in the lecture hall. This time with the help of my friend, Indah, I manage to took his picture. Muahahah... Really stalker sia.. But i have to thank Indah because she let me use her as an excuse to take his picture.. hahaha.....

Ermm..hehehe...but the image was not so clear.. Because he moved around. And i think he did notice me because in the lecture hall wasn't crowded. But he don't know that actually i already took his picture. But its impossible that he didn't notice me because i'm special...in stupid laughter...hahaha...Shuang shuang said my laughter will just scare people if i laught like that in the middle of the night.

I had pass my skill test today. Well, i think at least i had done my best.. to pass...haha.. Actually in this re-test, i'm not really put on the 100% of effort on it.. I don't know. Maybe it's because i'm quite sure with the steps. However, lecturer still complain i'm still so slow. Who will not nervous when come to skill test? Except those expert, i think. I had passed this news to mom, i hope she can be at ease, at least for a moment. How i miss her...mom, i love you. And i know you also love me, am i right? And i also know you missed me a lot, because i just asked you that day before i took the bus to come back to Singapore.

Guys...
Guys are sucks. They always like to bully us.. I don't know bout others but most of the guys that i know, They are not a gentle men..because they are sucks. They really don't know how to respect others. Especially my landlord's son. Seriously, if i have extra money, I'll really just move out of this house. Internet is sucks, some more smoking, doesn't like to flush after using the toilet. Really don't know how they can live like this. Smelly toilet and landlord's younger brother, more worse. Smoke and pass motion at the same time. Damn smelly and himself also very smelly. Cannot tahan..really dun know how his wife bear with his smell sia...Just imagine, his wife need to sleep with a smelly, fat body..pitty her.. ANd and and..i'll know whether he is at home or not whenever i just reach the door. This is because he is too smelly till i can smell his odour as soon as i reach the door...OMG...
Guys AGAIN...
I kept met him these few days. Not really purposely go to those places that he always go but sometime and somehow, we'll just accidentally met each other in library, level 4 and sometimes at the corridor of SHS... My friends from China, most of them say he is not that handsome..haha...seriously i don't know how handsome is handsome to them...haha..maybe the taste are not the same, this also good because we certainly won't like the same guy.. Ok ok, back to that guy. He know my friend, but i don't want to ask her about him, because i just simply don't want her know about how i feel about him. Although sometimes, i do have the urge to know more about him, but remaining current situation also not bad. I'm not sure was that just my hallucination or too suspicious or something. i notice that he also look at me but yet, i can't read his mind and what he is thinking when he looked at me. Was it: "Why am i keep met her today?" or "Such a small world." or "Why this girl look at me and have that kind of expression? Why she look like that.." haha...think too much ...

i'm sad...

Today lots of things happen... Feel like a lots of things, but actually only 2 things that make me feel sad...1 is about school. Its my group's presentation tomorrow. And the 1 who in charge for the power point slides, do the power point slides with no sincerity... too plain... then ask her to add some picture or design on it, she get angry... I don't know how to open my mouth to ask her to re-do that... But i hope she know that not only her has tight schedule, but everyone do has their personal problems to settle.. Hope she understand our group's point of view... And i'll try my best to be a better group leader...
Another thing that make me feel sad was HE CHANGE HIS RELATIONSHIP STATUS IN TAGGED INTO SINGLE... This make me feel sad... and was wanted to cry... I know i shouldn't feel sad... because i'm the 1 who ask for break up...i dun know.. i'm so afraid 1 day, when i find out he has found a girl friend, i might feel very sad... OMG...i shouldn't stay in the past right? But yet i still don't want to move on in my relationship...

feel bad as a group leader...

I saw people as a group leader like very easy, but when it come to me, it was like omg...many things that have to worry about...like the information, the pathway, make sure we are all in the right track...etc, etc, etc...but sometimes when i ask some favor from my members, they just ignore me, i think... Because if they really care about these presentations and the favor that i ask from them, i think and sure that they will reply my sms, at least this shows they care....And at least it will make me feel better because they still willing to listen to me as a group leader.
I just read Leo's blog yesterday, and he also encounter the same problem. Maybe i'm not the worst but definately not the best. haha.. Stuck in the middle.. I was wanted to scold or talk to them, but just because i'm not good enough, therefore i always think that i'm not fit to do so. i don't want to lose to anyone. But yet i'm not putting my best, my whole effort on it.
Maybe have to thanks to H1N1, everything have to delay. Although keep on saying that next week will be a nightmare, but i'm still relaxe. I know that's not good, but since i have been here for more that 1 year, i never be seriouse on my study. Where is the passion and the determination that i had before? Where can i find it back? Who can help me? Not only talk and no action. Ohhh!! How i hate myself....
And if i talk all this thing to him, i think he will say so: u already try your best as a leader, so no need to worry... And you should think more about yourself...blah blah blah.....then he will take some example from his life, then tell me all this shit that i don't want to know. That's why i like to watch tv and talk on the phone so that it will distract mt attention..hahaha... I know its not good...
SEE...it doesn't help at all. Now i no need to share my problem with him anymore, because we already break up. Muahahahaha...bad girl...

work day...

Went for work today. And i thought won't have a lot of costumers but i was wrong. Although today got lots of part timers, but all are new and don't have any experience. So all of us are damn busy. And the food are so slow till costumers want to talk to the boss. Hahaha and as we expected, boss don't dare to face those costumers. At first he ran away but we forced him and he got no choice but to face those angry costumers. That was a funny scene because he never face and solve the problem on the spot but choose to ran away. Hahaha...now he know how it feel when deal with all those costumers who are damn angry and complain non-stop. I hope he can really solve the problem this time without any stupid idea.

Went out for fun..

Today, went out for some swimming session with Chin but it's more like a soaking session. Because we just soaked in the water for 2 hours. And guess what? We pay that for $1 for that..hahaha.. I'm not saying that it's not worth it, but due to our lateness, we reach that pool around 11am. Plus what's make me more upset was there was not much of sunshine today, when i need it the most...haiz..
After that we went for singing session at K-box in AMK but not the one near AMK hub. It's a bigger one, it look nice and the facility also not bad. But the service not so good. Maybe all their workers are having menses at the same time. That's why they work and services are like hell. But we do have fun there. Sing and yell like no body's business. Fun sia...oh ya, and we dance like we are in a disco...
He had agreed to break up with me. I should feel happy for that but the way he say it, does not make me feel happy at all. But more like sad. Don't understand why, friend say it's because my heart is still with him. I have to admit that deep inside my heart...only it can tell the truth..but not me.. i hope i'll not regret and beg him come back to me..
and 1 more bad news, i became fatter and fatter now.. haiz... i must not gain weight again, so that he won't look down on me.. hahaha...
And and and 1 more thing, Chin had ant phobia...hahaha...the story that she told me make me laugh till my tummy ache..hahaha..damn funny... i think i'll laugh among myself whenever i saw ants... ANTS=CHIN... hahahaha....hahahahahaha

started a new blog...

I have started a new blog today. As i started this new blog, i think i also had started a new life and a new beginning for myself. But i still haven settle one personal matter yet, which is whether now I am single or still attached. So confused. Because of his sudden disappear (i don't know whether it is really just want to avoid me or something), i really don't know what i should call myself...a girl friend to someone or a girl who is just break up with her boyfriend.
I watched a movie with a friend today. The feeling was just not as good as before. Like not really enjoying the movie with a friend but more like watching a movie with a stranger. Maybe its because of we don't have "clicks" with each other. I think so. Perhaps I should stop looking for someone that really have the "clicks" with me. Because those who really have "clicks" with me (mostly guys), I already chase them away from my life. Although I lost them, but I still have a bunch of girlfriends around me who are very nice to me. (i think)...haha...and I'm glad that I'm not alone in this world..
Well, next week is going to be a tough week for me and my group members, because we have 3 presentations, and 2 test in 1 week. Plus i still need to retake my skill test in the same week. Hoo..stress sia..well, i must try my best so that i won't regret after all the test, right? (comforting myself)...
Lastly, i hope everything can be settle down in the shortest period and hopefully nothing will happen this week because i don't want any bad mood to affect + distract my study...ohmm..